My eating disorder story – Chatting to mum

My eating disorder story – Chatting to mum


Mum, hi Hello Hi Mum, So, I just wanted to talk to you about when I had anorexia and what I was going through and the kind of things that you noticed that made you realise I wasn’t happy so what was the first thing you would say that you picked up on that you realised something isn’t isn’t okay with Kat something’s going on? Well the first thing that made me aware there was something wrong was I could smell something, sounds awful, but I could smell something in your bedroom that didn’t smell right I sort of sniffed around and it was coming from your bedside table, chair, chest thing and I opened it and inside I found a bag that must have been from your school lunch or something with a rotting cheese roll that was mouldy and smelled awful and that kind of made me aware or think there’s something going on here and then I happened to see your diary on the bed and I would never ever invade your privacy normally but because I was concerned I had a little look in your diary and I’m afraid you know what the kind of things it was saying there and I can’t remember exactly but I do remember it alerted me there’s something really serious going on here Scary stuff Then what did you, what did you do next? ’cause I remember, I remember you called a helpline at one point Your memory’s probably better than mine did I I remember you called a helpline and they said that I was showing classic symptoms of anorexia Yeah I know I made an appointment at the doctors Yeah and the doctor wasn’t very sympathetic Really? No I mean this, we’re going back a few years aren’t we? Yeah She wasn’t terribly sympathetic when I say sympathetic she, she weighed you and said why don’t you just eat more? You know Really? words to that effect, yeah God, I don’t remember that Yeah she didn’t, I think however having said that she must have referred us or you to a child psychologist/psychiatrist Yeah I had like kind of regular counselling to start with didn’t I? And then it was the counsellor that referred me to the specialist That’s right, yeah Yeah ‘Cause I do remember when I got referred I had to go back to the doctors to have lots of tests and like physical tests done and I remember the nurse obviously hadn’t read my notes because they weighed me and she said “Ooo, you should, you should eat more” and I remember thinking like that’s kinda why I’m here Yeah I remember you It’s interesting having put on some weight you know when they weighed you ’cause they weighed you quite regularly I think you’d put on a pound or something Basically my scales here were inaccurate and the scales at the doctor were accurate and I weighed, I weighed more than a thought I did and You were in tears Yeah, I was supposed to go to counselling, I was supposed to have a counselling session afterwards Yeah and I couldn’t face it, I couldn’t, and I remember sitting in the back the, and you went in and spoke to the counsellor Yeah had a chat Yeah, I mean the counsellor, I have to say was excellent Yeah, no she was She was very very good She specialised in eating disorders didn’t she, if I remember rightly? The first one, I don’t think did I think that’s why she referred me to the specialist Yeah But either way yeah she, yeah she was ’cause I think you needed someone to talk to as well Well I did, because once you do realise that you’re looking for signs Yeah and it wasn’t until you know as I say I’d found that cheese roll and realised something was wrong, I read your diary and taken you to a doctor and then I started to notice things that you had hidden extremely well before like not eating your lunch at school and wearing clothes that don’t show how slim you are and you were always a slim child so it wasn’t obvious when you had a problem No and I think that’s really important as well because and I think I might have mentioned this earlier but it doesn’t, you don’t have to look at a certain way to be ill No, no you actually had always been slim Yeah and that wasn’t what alerted me at all it was, as I said the food the smell of the rotting cheese roll in your, or ham roll or whatever it was No, and I think that’s it and I think now I’ve kind of been through that I feel a lot more comfortable talking to you and Dad about that kinda thing like if I felt like I was anxious or anything like that I think now that we talked about it openly I wouldn’t ever worry about speaking to you guys before and I, it’s funny, I even read it out in my diary that after the doctors, after the counsellor told you guys, I was like oh they were okay, my parents were okay actually they weren’t too bad and I said I don’t know what I was expecting you guys to react like but I just remember I was like oh no they were okay actually they were, they were nice I don’t know, I genuinely don’t know what I thought Didn’t know what to expect Any advice for any parents who might be worried about their child or might have niggling concerns? It’s very difficult because as I said you didn’t look any different and I wasn’t aware there was a problem until until the episode I told you about but, I would say if there are any signs that your child has got a problem to straightaway go, if they’re of an age where you can, go with them to the doctor and seek their advice first really, because they know the people to refer you to and talk to them you know, just sort of, be able to talk to your child Try and get you know, conversation going and talk about, things There was something else I remember you guys kind of, the reason like I did end up going to doctors and going for counselling, you didn’t force me, you weren’t like you have to go to the counsellor, you have to go to see the doctor I remember you kinda approached it as I don’t think you’re happy, I think you could do with talking to someone about that and I wasn’t happy, I was really, really, in a dark place I knew that I didn’t want to be there anymore and I knew that, and I thought oh maybe they’re right, maybe this will help me get out of that

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